How do you react when your kid asks impossible-to-answer questions? I've caught myself with my own girls, saying at least to the older one, hmm....google that yup I know terrible.
By Rachel Elbaum (posted on TodayMoms)
“Why doesn’t God sleep?” asked my 4-year old son at dinner the other night. I gave what I hoped was an age-appropriate answer, while really thinking, 'When did you turn into a theologian?' Since kids were invented, they have asked parents questions that stump even the most intelligent among us. What are the best ways to answer them, and when is it OK to say you just don’t know?
Today, thanks in part to the Internet, finding answers is easier than ever. Looking up explanations can be a fun activity to do together, and sites like Whyzz give parents “kid-ready” explanations to an endless array of topics, including animals, holidays and the human body. It even covers more serious issues like death and illness.
Another site, Life’s Little Mysteriesis great resource for older children, and has a range of answers to head-scratchers like, “What if there were another technologically advanced species?” or “Why do Americans and Brits have different accents?”
There’s also no shame in admitting to your child that you don’t know.
“Parents seem to believe that they have to have answers for everything, but it’s good for children to realize that their parents are not all knowing,” says Susan Newman, social psychologist and author of several parenting books, including “The Case for the Only Child.” “You can suggest that they call an uncle or aunt who may know, with the added benefit that you are strengthening the bonds that they have with their relatives. And depending on the question, you can explain that there are people who have been searching for the answer for thousands of years and they haven’t found it yet.”
Even if you do know how to respond to your child, try listening to what they think instead of replying right away.
“Giving your child a chance to be heard makes him use his brain and also validates what he thinks,” says Newman. “Often it can be easier to give a straight answer, but it’s better for the child and for your relationship to talk it out.”
And if there’s a question that you really don’t want to answer? That’s OK too, say the experts, as long as you explain that in the right way.
“It’s ok to be honest and say, I don’t want to talk about this right now, but we can talk about it later,” says Brenda Nixon, author and host of Internet radio show “The Parents Plate.” “You always want to keep communication open with your child, and saying that you will talk about it later is not dismissing the child but letting them know that there are boundaries.”
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