Monday, May 21, 2012

I am Sick! But I am fine. Really I am.

momsmiami.com

If I were a man I'd be in bed moaning.  But I'm a mom so I have to be sunshine and roses and pretend nothing much is wrong.  As a single mom, i don't have anyone to complain to anyway. Remember when your mom got so fed up she said "I don't want to hear it, talk to the wall."  Well that's what I do, and it is/was more helpful then complaining either to my ex.  The wall doesn't try to one up me with maladies.  If I had a cold, he had tuberculosis; if I had a headache, he had a brain tumor.

And I see it's not just my ex who was afflicted with this man disease, I can see it repeating itself all over the Facebook feeds.

Besides, I prefer suffering alone.

When sick, I never complain to my daughter beyond, "Please stop banging the pots against the cat.  I am not feeling up to it." 

My child is yet too young to make healing chicken soup or masking gin & tonics. 

Then I'll feed her, bathe her, help her pick clothes for tomorrow, make her lunch, read her two books and say our prayers. Then it's my time after I feed and soothe the cat.  I can do some work or pamper myself. 

Work always wins out. 

Rather than feed a cold, I'm ignoring it, and so is the cat on my lap who apparently doesn't mind that my nose is dripping on his fur.   

I went to work today and a parent-teacher conference.  If a dragon needed slaying I'd do it. I'll be up at 6 tomorrow starting another day.  I can't afford to miss a day of work.  I need to hoard the days in case she gets sick.  Or the cat gets sick.  Or the car/internet gets sick. 

Mother, heal thyself.  

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